For a while now, I’ve been in a slump with a bad headspace and just low self-esteem in general paired with a lack of motivation, headaches, irregular sleeping habits and other issues. It sucked but it’s nice to see that I’m doing better, hence uh,… post!
The main issue for me was to get up out of bed, work on university stuff, study, prepare for the next ones, prepare stuff for the blog posts/streams, and then I’d also need to shower, cook, wash, or clean over here… It was a pain in the arse. My days were packed and while I was tired all day, I would end up being wide-awake until late at night because once you enter your bed while stressed, your body wants to procrastinate the sleep so that you can get all the things done that you’re stressed out about. There’s a name for it but I forgot it, honestly… Uh, apparently, it’s a lot more common than I thought it was.
What I did against that, however, is that I’d try and do things at the same time. There’s this one rule called the 3-2-1-0-rule where you eat at least three hours before you plan on sleeping, where you stop working at least two hours before your bedtime and where you shut down all monitors and electric devices an hour before you sleep. And well, when you hear the alarm in the morning, you just get up immediately to train your body to not sleep more again. Either way, it’s hard but it kind of worked. At least trying to fall asleep at a similar time, wake up at the same times and eat at the same times really helped me with getting my rhythms in check and it helps me with getting tired in the evenings and waking up in the mornings.
For a while now, I’m trying to quit smoking again. I did stop for a while but then picked it up again and it was honestly frustrating because I didn’t want to smoke again. Now, I ended up quitting cold-turkey again, which was hard and it worked for three weeks but then I relapsed again and basically smoked a pack of cigs before trying to quit again now for a week or something. I’m honestly not counting anymore as I really want to and I must say that with these frequent “breaks” from it, it’s gotten a lot easier to go through the process. The first week is the hardest apparently but I’ve noticed that it’s only the first day now and that everything past that feels a lot easier really.
Uhm, my headaches have gotten a lot better by the way thanks to the sleep I’ve been getting at the same times and stuff. I’ve also changed my sleep attitude as of late by training myself to say “I can now rest” instead of “I have to sleep” and by closing my eyes at night instead of watching the clock or whatever. According to a physician over here that I asked, vocabulary like that can help a lot with relaxing your body/preparing yourself to fall asleep and it can help with better sleep quality as well. Taking a look at the clock, however, will essentially put stress on you again, which results in a harder time with falling asleep. But I guess my headaches have also been a lot better thanks to my iron levels in the blood. I’ve been eating a lot more spinach, fish, meat, and veggies and been trying to mix things up a lot more so that I stay at the proper levels for a longer time. A while ago, I donated half a litre of blood again and since I’m eligible to do it again, I did it yesterday again and my iron levels still seem to stick around 15-18 uh… units. Which is excellent! 13 is the minimum to donate btw. Either way, donating blood is still iffy for me as I have a hard time seeing blood and stuff but it’s been getting better and due to me hydrating a lot more these days, I’ve noticed that the blood donation process just gets completed a lot quicker. Either way, I feel like losing and regenerating blood makes me feel a bit better circulation-wise. I’ll have to see how working out will affect things as I planned on maybe doing some things for my fitness in the near future… I haven’t started yet but I’m slowly getting there.
So, overall, I’m feeling good. The weather’s shit but I don’t let it rain on my mood. Yesterday, I also managed to tell three people to wear their masks properly, which was surprising for me/felt good because I’m usually too shy/anxious for that sorta stuff… but at the same time, it just pisses me off, so maybe that was an act of aggression instead of courage.
Life’s nice and it’s good to see me actually getting a bit of adulting done. Getting my chores done in time, eating properly, waking up in the morning, procrastinating less, and all of that stuff is hard but I’m getting there. And that’s cool and I’ll have to take my time doing it essentially.
Oh well. Cheers!