Today, I got an e-mail from some legitimate-looking site asking if they could use a web crawler to archive my blog on their site, so that people in 5/10/15/20 years can research gaming, critics, etc.
I say “ask” but they actually only told me that they will do that… and that I can refuse if I want to. I responded that I don’t want them to do so.
Alas, I’m making a post about it as I didn’t really have a post for today.
Research is great and I support it fully but I don’t get why researchers wouldn’t be able to just check out my blog in the future as well. Sure, WordPress may not work in the future… Nah, just kidding. There may happen something to my blog or my site that will stop me from ever posting on here again… But I’m sure that my posts will persist on the world-wide-web without any issues even if I don’t want it to be. Nothing gets lost on the internet after all, right?
But the way they did this was rather ugly. They formulated everything in their e-mail so overly flowery, hiding their intention, to the point where I had to ask Frosti if he could translate it for me. At first, I was wondering if this is spam but after checking site upon site and sources, as well as reverse-image-searching for that woman that mailed me, I found out that it’s actually legitimate. Alas, I found it weird that they didn’t use language that makes it easier to understand.
Alas, I don’t really know how this won’t affect my blog’s performance and why people wouldn’t just ask me any questions in case they want to research my blog. If there was one researcher or scientist who would ask for permission to use my site, I’d allow it probably (don’t take that as permission btw, e-mail me instead). It’s a different story to just scrape off content like that, factually stealing it, and then uploading it to another public site where it’s just going to get checked out by people that won’t have to visit my site.
My blog works in the same way that their archive works… with the simple difference that my blog and all content hosted on here is owned by me. I mean, the words I wrote and the thoughts I thought were my intellectual property, right?
So I declined the offer. But I’m sure there is some site somewhere that is doing that already and I don’t have the resources to check every single site on the internet, I guess.
Alas, I thought I’d introduce something to my blog that a lot of other bloggers also have on their sites… the following block:
Is it gonna do a lot? Probably not. Will it protect me from worrying that my posts are getting used somewhere else to generate money for other people? A little bit.
The big idea here is that I’ll basically just put that in all of my 261 posts so far (or at least most of them) and the many more to come… At the same time, people potentially will find that post and get lead to my site where it actually originated from. The catch is that I’ll have to add this reusable block to 261 more posts… and I’m kinda annoyed by that already… oof.
Maybe I’m being a bit sensitive about this or a bit paranoid… but I don’t want other people to earn money off of stuff that I created, especially when I don’t earn a cent in the first place and when I wouldn’t receive anything from them. I feel like that’s fair enough, right?
What are you guys’ thoughts on this? Have you had to deal with people stealing your posts before? What have you done against that? Any other suggestions on how to make this place safer against that? Let me know!
For the last couple of days, a lot of things have been going on. The Capitol Riots are one of the most agitating and saddest things I’ve seen in the last few years apart from the countless demos in Germany by people that are too stubborn, too lazy, too anxious to believe that there’s a threat out there that actually kills people.
I wanted to write about this topic, just shortly, to make you know that I do not condone any sort of false information or fake news spread on my blog or in my community on Twitch. I do not condone any sort of QAnon/Querdenker type of bullshit to be spread here. If you’re a conspiracy theorist who’s thinking about lizard people, Bill Gates, and some sort of dictatorship in Germany led by Jews or whatever, then please, please, please, would you kindly fuck off from here.
I do not condone any sort of hate speech or bigotry spread on here. My stream is an LGBTQIA+ safe space and we have many people from all over the world in our community. I do not want to hear any sort of racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia, transphobia, or other forms of slurs, bigotry, and insults in there targeted at members of our community or me. I do not condone anyone targetting anyone on my blog and I’ll continue to delete comments like that whenever I see them.
I am all for a discussion but I don’t plan on giving a platform to those people that are spitting on democracy and our values and that are leading riots and demonstrations against the state and against lockdowns, carelessly ignoring hygiene rules and masks and whatever, carelessly endangering anyone that might die from it or might come in contact with the elderly, the sick and the weakened.
I won’t give a platform to those people that fight actively against democracy and wield black, red and white flags while marching into the Capitol or any other place. I won’t give a platform to the Cheeto or to any of the Nazis, QAnons, Maga people, Covidiots, and other supporters that Cheeto has been inciting.
I won’t give a platform to more violence, physical, mental or verbal. I won’t give a platform to anyone who calls the BLM movement a “terrorist group” or anything like that and who generalises all of the movement against white supremacy and racism as a “group of looters and terrorists”.
I thought that even I have a platform, so I should mention my stance on it and some of my thoughts. What happened at Capitol is horrible and I’m sorry to hear that the Cheeto had another Trump Card like that. I hope the nightmare is over soon and I hope that it’ll get better soon. Arnold Schwarzenegger has published a message to his fellow Americans and friends around the world on his Twitter account and I recommend watching it.
I want this place to be a place where we can talk about games and enjoy Indie stuff and other games and after getting a few racist trolls on WordPress I decided to publish a post that explains my position here as someone who streams and blogs and tweets and speaks. As someone who’s able to not just review games but also have a stance on things. I’m not neutral, after all. Alas, I should make clear that I’m against Nazis and Racists and Sexists and all the other bigots in the world and the fucking idiots out there that are still endangering people. I hate it when people enjoy the freedom of speech we have here only to spout nonsense and hate speech and only to incite to violence against politicians and refugees and immigrants while saying that there is no freedom of speech. I hate it when peaceful protestors get struck down while the police are the ones that are being attacked when Querdenker movements start acting with tens of thousands of people in Berlin or wherever. I should note here that I hate racism among cops and I hate that it’s a thing, be it in Germany or in America. In Germany, it’s not as bad as in America, I would want to say, but I actually don’t have any statistics at hand as there are politicians that don’t want to investigate racism among policemen and soldiers. I wonder why. So, it’s a thing, yes, but I still hate it when people get attacked. Not all cops are bad, but a lot of them are. I hate it when some of the good ones out there, defending the parliament against those violent protestors that want to feed their families or whatever – well, I hate it when those people get attacked. I mean, I hate it when people get attacked, period. I don’t want to see that happen to any of us. But sadly, a lot of the bad cops and the racists and whatever are letting people go on like that even when they get attacked in Germany, while they open the gates for the rioters on Capital in America. Fuck Racists and Bigots among the cops.
Alas, uh, I can sum up that I’m for freedom of speech and for democracy but against Nazis and Bigots and all of those people that are against democracy. With Alex Turner’s words “perhaps fuck off might be too kind” but uh… you can have your opinion, just don’t share it here and don’t spread hateful stuff on my blog or in my stream. Thank you. If possible stop being hateful, period. Don’t hurt people. Be kind to others. Don’t be an asshole.
“Die Gedanken sind frei” – your thoughts are free, after all. Your words can hurt, though.
So, yesterday, Belghast actually published a post on his games of the year 2020. His list featured a variety of games that I have either been eyeing or that I’ve watched or even played. I definitely recommend his post!
But this lead to me thinking… what is a “game of the year” anyway and why does it have to be just one and no more than one title?
In my opinion, the title of “game of the year” should go to a game that really coined a year. A game that you couldn’t escape from no matter where you went… a game is omnipresent on YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, Twitch, and on all other streaming platforms, media outlets and websites. I feel like a game like that is probably hard to make. A game that doesn’t get outshined by other games despite being released before any other games. I feel like that would be a game of the year.
The Game Awards nominated six games for the title: Doom Eternal, Final Fantasy VII Remake, Ghost of Tsushima, Hades, Animal Crossing: New Horizons, and The Last Of Us Part II. In the end, I had to google who won and apparently Naughty Dog’s “The Last of Us Part 2” is now the game of the year 2020 which actually surprised me.
The surprise mostly came because I didn’t really realise that it came out this year. At the same time, the hype wasn’t that big around it, if I remember correctly, and it wasn’t as present on Twitch as Ghost of Tsushima, for instance. On top of that, I also heard a lot of bad things about TLOU2 and the one instance of me watching a stream of that game… was not good. I’ll post on that eventually as well but uh spoilers and stuff.
Anyways, that resulted in me checking up on how nominees are selected in the first place and what kind of authority the game awards are to be able to just decide what game deserves that title… and well, apparently, that’s a stupid question. I mean, The Game Awards apparently are kind of a big deal and I just wasn’t aware of that, really. There is an “international jury of over 95 global media and influencer outlets, selected for their history of critical evaluation of video games” in place that decides nominees based on a lot of factors, also including categories like esports and accessibility. The producer of the Game Awards, Geoff Keighley, himself is not a member of the jury and doesn’t vote on winners or nominees. As far as the nominations go, the jury I mentioned above votes via ballots and votes on their top five titles. Based on those votes, five titles are nominated each year. In case of a tie, there will be six nominees, just like this year!
Alas, it makes sense that there are titles by big studios like Nintendo and Square Enix while also smaller studios like Supergiant Games represented in the top six, this year. Hades probably would have been my vote as I didn’t play any of the other games (although, I did buy Doom Eternal and will play that soon). I’m not too fond of remakes, especially after what they did with Destroy All Humans earlier in 2020… and I don’t own a Switch so I won’t be able to play ACNH anytime soon. I don’t own any consoles, making it hard for me to play Ghost of Tsushima or TLOU2. In the end, I only played Hades (as far as the nominees go) and would probably have nominated Lightmatter, Drake Hollow, Risk of Rain 2, and some other titles.
Obviously, “The Game Of The Year” is not a game that coined the year… but I just feel like the title kind of implies that. It kind of implies that it’s THE game of THAT year. When you’d talk about 2020 in gaming you wouldn’t be able to talk for two minutes before bumping into that game… It is the game of the year after all… So maybe I’m a bit hung up on that name or the title or my definition but it doesn’t seem like it actually means what it, in my opinion, entails or implies.
When I think of titles that coined the year, I’d probably think of Fall Guys or Among Us. I literally couldn’t escape Among Us for the longest time, so I played it as well, got burned out, and eventually, it came back to me when friends from my old high school chatted me up and wanted to play it with me. Even Ms Magi who doesn’t really play any games was aware of Among Us and did install it on her phone at one point, resulting in us having conversations about it… although she wasn’t too captivated by it.
Anyways, Among Us probably wouldn’t be eligible for nomination since it came out two years ago… or it didn’t get nominated.
But there’re also other categories and Among Us ended up being the “Best Mobile Game” and Fall Guys, for instance, also scored in quite a lot of categories. Hades won Best Indie and Best Action, which was lovely to see. It was great to see Carrion, If Found, Spiritfarer, Through the Darkest of Times, and some other indie games also seeing love.
In the end, I don’t really think highly of game awards like that but I love seeing that Indie Games stand close to other games in categories like “Best Action” or whatever. I love seeing a lot of games that I’ve watched or played be nominated for big awards like that but I don’t really care about the winner, to be honest, unless it’s a game I’ve never heard of – in which case, I’d google and potentially wishlist it. So, while I enjoy seeing the nominees, I don’t like the actual award being handed to a title, as I most likely would wrap my hands around my head and wonder why that specific title got that specific award.
This sounds like I’m constantly whining about why my favourite game didn’t win or whatever but in reality, it’s just me complaining that “of course The Last Of Us Part 2 got the GOTY award” for a minute or two before sipping my coffee and moving on. It doesn’t really matter much… I mean, there’s going to be a GOTY edition of this game that I probably won’t play. Again, more on that soon. But in the end, it doesn’t affect me. I don’t have these annoying friends anymore that would just try and annoy me by saying that they were right and that I was wrong or whatever. Honestly, I don’t care really. I just moan about it once and forget about it two minutes later as I browse who else got nominated for the indie titles that actually interest me.
Congrats to the winners. Congrats on the nominees. Happy New Year to everyone else!
Some games out there are real gems but will never get any attention. And that’s sad, so I started reviewing games on this blog and recommending underrated games to friends and eventually, this became a big part of my life. It’s a hobby that I’ve been doing for more than a year now and it’s always fun to find gems and recommend stuff and write down my thoughts about all of these things. Lovely!
Meanwhile, other gems out there are well-known and have their own dedicated communities. People know titles like Slay the Spire, The Binding of Isaac, Stardew Valley, etc. already. Do they need more reviews or should I even write about titles like that?
Note: Since I forgot to take any screenshots for most of the games I’m mentioning in this post apart from Hades, I’ll only use screenshots from Hades. I’ll keep it spoiler-free, though, so no worries about that.
That’s something that I’ve been thinking about a lot for the past couple of months. I’ve got countless posts sitting in the drafts about titles that I wanted to review and that I wanted to talk about. Just when I was about to get ready for the finishing touches, I ended up hesitating: Do I add something to the world by just saying what is already known? There are too many reviews for me to add any new thoughts to the same topic, after all, right?
And that’s where my opinion changed recently: The fact that it’s a review by me should be enough to make my review different from other reviews.
Even though everyone has probably said everything about every popular game out there, I can’t be 100% sure about that without having read all of the reviews out there. Obviously, that’s not possible. I can’t read every review out there and honestly, I don’t want to. In the first place, I don’t read reviews on games that I’m reviewing until after I’ve posted them as I don’t want to get influenced by other people’s opinions on the matter. I feel like that’s quite important, especially as I don’t want to accidentally or subconsciously write something similar or maybe even the same sentences as someone else has.
Alas, I kind of changed my opinion on the matter. Of course, countless people probably know about Graveyard Keeper, Monster Train, Celeste, and the like, but I think that my opinion should matter as well. Maybe I actually do have something to add to the giant pool of reviews out there. Maybe I actually do have a different point as to why a game should or should not be bought.
Every opinion matters, after all, and alas, every review is important. There probably is someone out there that hasn’t played Celeste yet or that has been hesitating to play it because they don’t like Platformers… and only recently, I played it for the very first time and enjoyed it a lot! It made me feel good about myself as a person that plays games as I was dashing through the air in levels that other people thought were really difficult. Meanwhile, Celeste was thought-provoking and challenging in other rooms when people said that it was an easy level while I was struggling to figure out what the intended way was and whether or not my way was doable, at all. There are countless reviews on Celeste out there but I’m not sure if any platformer-haters out there have taken a look at the game only to say that it’s actually great as an introduction to platformers. I don’t know if people that hate the genre would pick it up. Alas, my opinion as someone like that, as someone who hates and sucks at platformers, matters! My opinion matters and in that instance I probably have something meaningful to add to the ocean of reviews.
Or take Hades, for instance, the game that got updated so much during Early Access that I ended up having to rewrite my review a total of nine (!) times because things that I didn’t like got changed or updated and suddenly with new implementations old weapons and boons actually were incredibly strong or powerful. I suddenly enjoyed those, so I rewrote a few paragraphs, only to realise that it all didn’t work out too well, as my style changed in that time. When I was done with rewriting it for the ninth time, it has already been released with its version 1.0 and everyone hopped onto the hype train, resulting in me feeling like my review wasn’t needed. Again, that mindset is bad.
I can praise and love Hades as much as I want to and I’ll do so eventually. I’ll be able to add a lot to the discussion as I’m a mythology-crack and as I love Transistor and Bastion. I probably have other takes on the game that other reviewers may not have had.
Alas, since I have had different interests in my life and since I’ve been enjoying different games, movies, books, poems, shows, and other media, my reviews may already have a different take on things. Just because I am obsessed with mythology, I may already have different bits and pieces of information to add to the discussion. Just because I’m into Drama and plays and stuff, I may already be able to connect lore pieces together or laugh about something that other people may not get.
I’m not saying that I’m better at reviewing games than other people or that my reviews are better or worse. I’m just saying that every review is unique and that every reviewer has different tastes, interests and takes on the same topic, making them unique and special and alas, their opinions are important.
What does this mean for me and my blog? Well, I’ll revisit all of those drafts and try to publish some of my older posts throughout the year and rework them to fit my current style and you’ll probably see some newer games in there as well as some more popular ones. There will be the odd one here and there with a very underrated and unknown game and I’ll just hope that it’ll get more attention.
I hope you liked my take on the matter. I feel as every take on a topic is important even if some if not all points are the same. As long as it’s written independantly it should be allowed to exist. As long as it’s a different person writing it, it already should be able to provide some new thoughts and opinions on it. And well, obviously, the people that read my blog posts are not the same that read Frosti‘s or Krikket‘s, right?
Alas, I hope you enjoyed this post and the next few on other stuff. Have a nice day and stay awesome!
This is a scheduled post and I hope that it’s not December 32nd now as I really want 2020 to be over.
2020 has been a difficult year with Covid being an issue for the most part. At the beginning of quarantine and the lockdowns and all of that, I ended up starting to stream five days a week instead of three days. This was mainly to give people a way to relieve their anxiety and give them some entertainment and chill times. At one point, we played Amnesia and joked about the Zombie virus and how there is a fungus (similar to the virus/fungus in TLOU) that infects ants and controls them to get eaten by birds… who then spread the spores. Very interesting. We also joked about how we would fare in a zombie apocalypse… I’d try to mediate as much as possible, and I would most likely die first… yup.
At the start of 2020, I was also messing around, saying that there is always a plague in the 20s. Guess I jinxed it. Yikes.
Overall, this has been not too much of a bad year for me personally, though. While I had my fair share of panic attacks, anxieties intensifying, depressive phases, social problems, and other problems, I also had a lot of good moments, like getting a lot of traffic on my blog and hitting some bigger milestones when it came to streaming. I also managed to overcome some of those problems and learn how to deal with them. I think I even grew as a person due to some of the struggles this year, which makes me feel more confident in handling rough situations in the future better! At one point, I also joined a Stream team which wasn’t that good since I’d always compare myself to other streamers and stuff… So, I ended up leaving Wild Abandon.
The last few months of 2020 were a bit troublesome when it came to streaming, though. My internet speed was getting slower in the evenings, resulting in me dropping a ton of frames. Alas, I changed my schedule to morning streams as they seem to work a lot better for me. Numbers-wise that proved to be a good decision as well as it has lead to me meeting a lot of awesome people. I’m lucky to slowly build a community like this and I’m looking forward to growing this Crypt of mine steadily over time with more Undead joining in to enjoy games together without having to fear bigotry or toxicity.
Back to blogging: We hit a few milestones, including one year of blogging, one-hundred followers, and also my participation in both Blapril and the Blaugust Promptapalooza! The latter felt a bit off and I was certainly struggling with providing content on my blog, especially as a lot of the prompts didn’t scratch the itch too well… but we managed to get a fair share of posts out in that time and the link-backs certainly helped guide new readers to my blog, I think. At this point, hello new readers. Pleased to meet you. Even though we don’t actually meet. Uh, pleased to write you? Pleased to read you? Doesn’t really work, does it? Uhm,… I’m pleased that you’re reading my stuff. Thanks for that!
Traffic-wise, I hit over a thousand views in some of the early months with the trend increasing into later months, so that’s something that I’m really proud of. It kind of proves to me that I’m doing things right and that the topics I post about actually resonate with people. I sometimes wonder how a post will do, especially when I try out something new or when I review a game that is just coming out. Seeing the number of interactions with the post or the tweets, however, brings a smile to my face and actually helps a lot with that “posting”-anxiety that I feel at times.
“Posting”-anxiety is probably not a term that exists but what I mean by that is that kind of fear that you have before publishing anything. Similar to how my heart starts racing once I’ve hit that “go live” button in OBS, resulting in me needing about ten minutes to calm down and be my reserved self that is actually happy to be live again. It’s a bit of an issue. What if nobody shows up today? What if nobody reads my blog post? What if nobody likes the game that I’m recommending here, even though it is a great title? Will people lose faith in me as a curator?
It really isn’t that bad with blogging, but at times I just tend to overthink anything and everything, which is something I want to get better at in 2021. I want to have more faith in my blog posts and my streams, and take better care of myself & my mental health. I want to have fun with what I’m doing and enjoy it while it lasts and while I’m able to stream and blog.
Speaking of Mental Health, I’m looking forward to going to therapy again. Due to my financial situation, I wasn’t able to visit my therapist anymore and ended up having to call all of the meetings off, as I just couldn’t afford it anymore. In the same fashion, I need to eat proper food again once 2021 starts and actually take care of my needs. Showering often, going to sleep early, waking up early, getting enough rest, taking enough breaks, getting enough steps in, taking a breather every now and then. Those things are really important and while I managed to get that kinda stuff sorted for a lot of 2020, which helped a ton, I also ended up falling back into old patterns of skipping meals, staying up all night long, eating too late and hence not being able to sleep, and so on. But then again, we had that post yesterday, so uh… y’know… read that for more in-detail-stuff.
Let’s go over my blogging goals, at last:
In 2021, I wanted to familiarise myself with the Classic Editor and all of the blocks in the Gutenberg Editor. So far, I’ve only been using the Gutenberg Editor but the Classic Editor has some features that looked more than promising, as far as formatting goes. I’d also like to meddle with all the different blocks that are available in Gutenberg. I haven’t played around too much with the different galleries, as of late, and there are plenty of features that I haven’t tried at all, yet.
That’s something I want to change. I want to bring the best out of Indiecator and get the most value out of my reviews and other posts. I wanted to be more consistent with the Monster Hunter Log and the Late to the Party posts as well as the occasional Stray Sheep and Lookout Post… post… yup.
I want to try out new things and see how it goes. Something that I haven’t tried at all, yet, is uploading playthroughs to YouTube or embedding the first hour or so of gameplay into my reviews to give people a better look at the game. There is only so much that I can do as far as explaining goes… and people will have the option of watching it or not watching it. Obviously, rendering stuff is going to be a pain in the butt, as well as editing videos again… as that’s something that I haven’t done ever since I got that workshop for Magix back in 2012 or 2013… so no clue really if my knowledge is going to be good enough for other programs. I’ll look into it, starting this year.
Apart from that, I started doing digital art in Krita in late-2020 and been really enjoying doing panel art and emote art for my own stream and other people. I have yet to think about whether or not I wanna take commissions but I’ll let you know when I do. I’d love to get into animation and bring some of my emotes to life on-screen… looking forward to GIF-creation and potentially creating some animated alerts for the Stream as well.
As far as streaming goes, there are a plethora of goals that I have in mind for that:
There plenty of things that I’m working on right now and it all is a Work in Progress! So stuff changes and improves over time! Patience is key! The other day someone offered to animate things for free for people, so I messaged them if they were serious and if I could really ask them to do something for me… free of charge. As I was completely broke at the time, I was more than happy to hear that I’m able to get an ultra-awesome Stinger transition for my Stream as well as a super-duper-awesome animated “Starting Soon” screen that is in-line with my current branding. I’m really excited to implement that into my stream and once it’s out I’ll write about it again and credit the artist and all of that. Really looking forward to seeing how people react to it! I, for one, am deeply in love with it!
Aside from that there are some other goals:
Always say “yes”, unless uncomfortable.
Use Drama experience! (for entertainment, voice tone, volume, acting, etc.)
Educate myself on Mental Health and LGBTQIA+ related topics so that I know more about them and so that I can spread more awareness on those topics and how to handle questions on those topics.
Make the Stream more accessible. (Closed Captions, Content/Trigger warnings)
Be more positive in general about myself and towards others.
Work more on my emotes.
Be more consistent.
Think up more creative ideas for the Stream and the Branding.
Now, the post is already really long, as is, but let me just quickly clarify something: When I say “always say yes” then I mean that you take an opportunity in chat and turn it into something entertaining. It’s basically the backbone of improv and I want to use more of that and my Drama experience in my streaming to an extent but I don’t want to tolerate trolls, bigots or toxic people, so I won’t *always* say yes… just when it’s an opportunity. The other day, someone said something about One Direction, so I took that and said that I’m their biggest fan. Then I mentioned something stupid about how my favourite song by them is “Sucker for you” (which is obviously not by them) and how my favourite member of that band is Logan (who was in some other band as well), resulting in someone in chat really liking it. When someone comments on how I died, I’d say that I can’t die since I’m undead. All of that is merely an illusion. When I’m not good at the game, I can play it off as giving people a chance. When I am good at it, I can act as if that’s always the case with an ironic wink or whatever. There are plenty of ways to turn something boring and use it spontaneously to make it work for you and I feel like that’s something that I want to do more often.
Consistency and Quality are the backbone of streaming, so I want to up that, obviously. I want to brainstorm more on my branding which is what I do at basically any given time… Being more positive about myself and my looks and whatever is important for my mental health, so it ties into the goals from yesterday as well, but it is also important for the stream itself since a happy Magi is going to be more entertaining than a depressed Magi.
Talking about Mental Health and LGBTQIA+ related topics has been something I’ve enjoyed a lot in the past… educating myself on that is completely understandable as part of that. I want to understand what people go through and I want to be able to help. And at last, accessibility,… is tricky to deal with. There are a lot of things that I need to do but I haven’t figured them out just yet. Eventually, I’ll be happy with how accessible my stream is, but until then I’ll have to educate myself and look things up and try stuff out. Closed Captions are the first step towards that!
Either way, I hope you have a nice start to 2021. It’s definitely going to better than 2020, I think… Take care of your mental health and your needs. Take breathers whenever possible and don’t overwork yourself. Even with vaccines on the way, try to stay safe and try to not endanger too many people. I’ll probably wear my mask forever since I’m just not used to not wearing it. Do you have any resolutions for this year? Let me know!
For the last five years, I’ve made it somewhat of a tradition to think up New Year’s resolutions and while, at least around here, everyone says that nobody actually abides by their New Year’s resolutions… I usually faired quite well.
Before that, though: Content warning – There are pictures of cats in this post and if you’re scared of cats, beware! You’ve been warned!
As an example, I always managed to do “a little bit more sports” or go for a walk more often or eat healthier, etc. for the past couple of years. I knew that it was actually quite possible that I’d be able to do that, so then I paid attention to how often I actually bought fresh veggies and fresh meat instead of frozen stuff or canned food. At the same time, I’ve been eating less fast food and tried to cook a lot more often, which always worked out.
During high school, I ended up chugging “getting over my ex” and “getting out there again” on the list as well and it would work but I feel like that’s more of a luck-based thing. I was young and stupid so I made that one of my resolutions every year when I was single and heart-broken – and it worked, I guess. I’d always end up in a relationship afterwards because obviously life goes on and there is plenty of fish in the sea.
But even if it’s some unbelievably stupid goal like “going to Olympia this year” even though it won’t happen this year, it can be somewhat of a reassurance thing for someone as it reassures them that the next year is better than the last year.
Resolutions are a good thing in a way as they would always give me some goal to look forward to, even if it was silly or obvious or whatever. Now, everyone talks about how 2020 wasn’t the best year but I don’t really get that since 2019 wasn’t that good either… and well, 2018 was quite stupid, too. And 2017 and 2016 were not the best years either. (Wait a minute… Trump has been president during those four years, hasn’t he? I see a pattern!) – Obviously, there are reasons for 2020 being not the best year with Covid, Wildfires, Double-Hurricanes, Trump nearly winning, Floyd, Covidiots, and all the pressure that this whole pandemic-business has been putting on us this year. But in hindsight, every other year feels a bit better than this one when in fact, you probably were looking forward to 2020 because 2019 was finally over… at least my Twitter timeline was full of tweets like that.
Point is: I hope 2021 is going to be better than 2020 and I hope that my resolutions will give me some sort of red string to follow when I get lost in 2020. Alas, here are my personal resolutions for this year:
Be more positive.
Eat healthier and more frequently.
Try to stick to healthy sleep schedules and eating times.
Maybe do a bit more sports.
Focus more on my studies.
Call my distant relatives at least once a month. Like, at least some of them.
Call my parents at least twice a week.
Be less negative and less cynical.
So let me explain these goals to you. A couple of these goals are quite obvious like focusing more on my studies, eating healthier and more frequently, doing a bit more sports/training/work-out-stuff, calling my family on the phone… etc. – I mean, I’ve wanted to fix my sleep schedule for ages now but I haven’t been able to do that for a longer period of time as I’d every now and then end up eating too late or waking up super early and napping during the day and that kind of stuff. In the same manner, I’d often skip meals multiple times a day or just eat once every other day, resulting in me losing a lot of weight which isn’t that healthy (especially, as I can’t gain that much weight that well due to my metabolism). Alas, that’s a goal: Eat more food and make it good/healthy more often.
As far as distant relatives go, a lot of them won’t do me any good if I talk to them too much or too often which is why I usually put it off a lot… but I need to talk to my grandparents or my uncles and aunts and great-uncles and whatever every once in a while, I guess. Obviously, if they aren’t that good for me for various reason, it’s important to not let them influence me too much. Talking to them at least once or twice in a month should be alright, though, just to keep in touch a bit. As far as my parents go, the relationship can be kind of shakey, especially when I haven’t called in a while. Alas, I need to call them at least once in a while so that they don’t get too worried and so that they don’t get upset about me not calling or whatever. I feel like a lot of people know that.
At last: Being more positive and less negative. “Duh.”
More often than not, I feel like I have to vent about stuff which makes it seem as if I was a relatively negative person. For instance, I do get upset about stuff like covidiots from time to time who endanger people even with the pandemic still being a thing. I could rant about racist cops, bigots in general, nazis, Trump, and all of those “baddies” in the world for hours… but I could also just not do that. I don’t want to be that person that only really talks about negative stuff and how many bad things there are in the world. I’d rather be someone who encourages positivity and who helps people when they need to vent or when they need someone positive instead of more negativity. I’d love it if other people didn’t have to go through as many anxiety or panic attacks as me and I’d love it if they could get more relief from seeing one of my posts or tweets once in a while.
And obviously, I’m not gonna become one of those “chase your dream and escape the hamster wheel” guys or whatever… and I still have strong opinions on a lot of bigots… but I just wanna be less negative in general and maybe spread some more good vibes here and there. To do that, I could post more often about good things that happened to me in The Stray Sheep (if there are no posts in The Stray Sheep from now on then I guess 2021’s worse than 2020) or about some sort of accomplishment or whatever.
So I may rant or vent somewhere here and there or talk about how I’m drained or whatever but I don’t wanna be all about that… I want at least double the number of positive posts and good vibes to be spread by me! Or let’s triple or quadruple that number! Sounds good to me!
Apart from that, there are also other things that are entailed in being “more positive” like body positivity and working on how I see myself… and my mental health and being in a healthier mindset and headspace in general. Just like in all those other years, I want to be a better human and be there for others and get better at a plethora of things, so I feel like this might be a great step. Just being slightly less negative and a lot more positive. ^-^
Oh, and less cynical for sure. My motto in life is “Das wird schon” which means something along the lines of “it’ll work out somehow”, which is rather optimistic. However, I’m a super pessimist. I’m constantly going at things in life with the worst expectations if any at all because then I can’t be disappointed. I know that I’ll never be happy with the election results or with how the weather is going to be, so I just constantly expect the AfD to have all of the votes, which would be super bad… and then they don’t have that many votes, so I’m happy about it… kinda… and the weather? Well, I’m sure it’s gonna rain all-day every day for the next 90 years. Because that’s not gonna happen, my expectations have not been met… which is good because I didn’t really have any realistic expectations in the first place. When it comes to gifts, I don’t expect any gifts… and then I get gifts and I’m happy about them. Being less pessmistic and less cynical in those instances could lead to a bit more quality in life. I will still have low expectations of movies, games and shows. I will still have no expectations of other things… and I’ll still be more than happy when my expectations aren’t met and when something better ends up happening… I just want to be less of an asshole.
Being less of an asshole at times would be great as I can be quite sarcastic and cynical at times… and I don’t want that to happen. I want stuff to work out and hence, I want to be more patient with people and with myself. I don’t want to repeat so many of my past mistakes of constantly overthinking every single word that anyone said or any situation that has happened or could happen or whatever. At the same time, I don’t want to fall into that habbit again of forgiving toxic people again. Just recently I cut off someone who I knew for about eight years now. I don’t want to ramble too much about someone as egocentric and sexist and toxic as that guy, so I just won’t. Instead, I want to be better and focus my energy on the good things in the world and the great friends that I have and all the people I love and appreciate. I want to talk to more great people and be there for others. I want to play some games with people on my discord (btw, join if you wanna!) and play games with other bloggers and work on great blog posts or improve my stream and my blog. I want to be better than those people that bullshit others all the time. I want to be a good human being and live my life to the fullest. I don’t want to look back and regret anything. I’d rather have a great time before I die.
So, being positive and less of a cynic is gonna be great. Eating healthier and more often is gonna be great. Sleeping better and more frequently is gonna be great. Becoming a teacher eventually is gonna be great. Living a healthier life and taking care of my mental health is gonna be great. 2021 is gonna be great.
Just having those resolutions makes me already feel good about the new year. My goal of trying to be better and more positive is there and I’m working towards it and potentially it will come true or I’ll get as far as possible with it. It’s all a work in progress and I’m looking forward to that process of constantly working on things and reflecting on things I did or said or wanna do. I’m looking forward to eventually being someone that is happy with himself and that is able to lift others up as well. I’m looking forward to 2021.
Do you guys have any resolutions? What are your thoughts on them? Are they always the same or do you change them up? Do you make them come true or do they just stay in the Work In Progress phase until you write up new ones?
Let me know! And good luck with your resolutions if you have any. Happy New Year!
So, just earlier today I read GamingOmnivore’s post on Sharing a pastime where GO shares three stories from different stages in their life that coined their gaming experience. Alas, I wanted to do the same as I really like the prompt. DanamesX from Tales From The Backlog actually prompted this in an event they organised called Exp Share. Alas, check out their post(s) for this prompt as well, if you haven’t yet. They also linked to other bloggers that took part in the prompt(s).
I wanted to this in a similar way of GO and share different anecdotes on it.
Alas, the prompt is:
Share a story where you shared the gift of gaming OR someone shared it with you
When I was two or three years old, my father brought me to a store and saw that I took quite the interest in the N64 that was being sold their. According to my father, my eyes were sparkling, so he bought it for about 350 DMark which would translate to 175€ nowadays, I guess. Back then I was still an only child and when my friends at the time didn’t have time to play with me, I’d end up playing Super Mario 64, Pokémon Puzzle League or Mario Party on the N64. Memories are somewhat blurry but I mostly played Pokémon and SM64 back then. Puzzle League was my first encounter of puzzle-games of any kind, especially as this one was a competitive one, which was fairly interesting, especially due to the challenge of it. Super Mario 64, on the other hand, was probably my first-ever encounter with 3D games and platforming. I loved jumping around in that world and exploring different areas. I loved the area where you become smaller and bigger and where the world changes in prospect. Another area I loved was the sandy area with the hidden pyramid secret as well as the flooded city. Two areas that I absolutely hated where the under-water level encountered on the far right of the first hallway and the Ghost area. The Ghost area featured a piano that would move and attack you, which was terrifying for little me (and honestly still is)… Meanwhile, the under-water-level featured a giant eel that would come out of a wall and it would terrify me so much that I wouldn’t want to go swimming out of fear that something like that pops up. That could also be the reason why I only learned to swim when I was much, much older… A friend of mine also had an N64 so we’d often exchange cartridges so that we could play each other’s games. I didn’t like Banjo Kazooie at all but I loved Ocarina of Time. I did play Pokémon Colosseum at a neighbour’s place much much later… and I loved it.
In 2008, we got our first-ever PC. It enabled us to talk to our grandparents from afar without the abysmal telephone bills and we were able to see them as well via MSN. It was incredible! I never knew that the internet existed before that. On our PC, we used to play some flash games every now and then… but I think I had the most fun with Sonic Adventure DX Director’s Cut, a game where you experience the same story through the eyes of different characters in the Sonic universe. Each character had different abilities. Tails would be able to fly and would brag how he saved the day while Sonic would zoom around and while Knuckles would do his own thing, trying to find Chaos Emerald Shards. Meanwhile, Amy is chasing after Sonic and being hunted by some sort of robot and Big The Cat is trying to fish for Froggy, his friend, who ran away at one point. There was a fishing game mode, different races, and different stories, on top of having the Chao Garden where you take care of little creatures and sent them to races and stuff. Another game we received from a friend of my father was Beyond Good And Evil, which is probably the first-ever game that I did a 100% playthrough of. The Plot Twist in that game was amazing, at the time, although it probably isn’t nowadays when I think about other games with great stories. The combat was cool and I really enjoyed it. I also owned Oblivion and some Tomb Raider game as well as other titles (all gifts from that friend of my father who got them through some subscription for a PC magazine and who didn’t need the games as he was only interested in the software) but I failed to get into any of those… Especially due to big fucking spiders in Oblivion…
When I got my first-ever laptop, I was finally able to play online games like League of Legends and play with friends of mine. While the former two stories were about Single-Player games (mostly), this story is about my first encounter of other people on the internet. I remember playing League of Legends for the first time about ten or eleven years ago and really loving the game, especially as friends of mine were playing it. Through the game, I got to know many great friends… and this one guy that I cut off ties with recently… I got to play with IRL-friends and make Online-friends from all over the world. I even was able to enjoy the competitive nature of games, although I didn’t understand anything that people would say in those games (they probably were flaming me). Back in the day, when the Blood Thirster would give you stacking AD and when you could play anything anywhere, I would only play Ashe and basically just split push and win. Later, I met a proper Ashe one-trick who explained that Shiv is a great item on Ashe. Eventually, I started playing Riven when she came out and was actually really good at her… until I discovered my love for the Support role and my love for Taric who was actually really good but who people thought of as “gay”, which apparently was a bad thing. I kind of liked the idea of playing that character, getting focused by others and still surviving as I was a tank, healing allies and stunning enemies. I maybe also liked the sparkly things about the champ as I discovered some “tendencies” that I had IRL that I obviously couldn’t show to anyone, because – again – in that time it wasn’t as bad as before but I would have been beaten up for it for sure by my class mates who already were bullying me… not to mention my family to this day isn’t allowed to find out about any of this… but online that was a different thing. Eventually, I got into my first-ever MMOs, mainly Warframe and Swordsman Online. Later, I’d play Indie titles like Isaac and Don’t Starve on Steam, which was great. And by the time that I stopped playing stuff like Team Fortress 2, I’d end up playing so many other titles, claiming free games wherever possible, resulting in me already amassing somewhat of a backlog… which was the beginning of me contemplating what to play next and so on.
A year ago, I joined Twitch for the very first time. I apparently created an account ages ago but never used it… Then I ended up watching streams a year ago, not too long after creating this blog, and I think I even wrote a few posts on streamers that I’m recommending like Jimb0, XilentFlex, Aeyvi, and others. Jimb0 sadly doesn’t stream anymore and timezones make it hard for me to keep up with Aeyvi’s streams but XilentFlex is actually still a big inspiration of mine to start streaming, myself, and alas, I still tune into his streams whenever I can. Through Twitch I got to make a lot of friends and found joy in watching others play a game that I personally love… for the first time. Playing a game like Outer Wilds for the first time is a great experience. You get to see so many things and you explore and make discoveries yourself and you just end up really enjoying it… but once you had that first playthrough, you essentially can still play the game but you won’t have that first-ever “Aha!” moment. It won’t be the same anymore. Meanwhile, on Twitch, I’m able to see people play games like Outer Wilds or other titles that I love for the first time. I’m able to actually see their first-ever steps into resolving that mystery and solving puzzles and so on. It’s lovely! At the same time, I got to make many great friends on Twitch while also building my own audience as well in my streams. And I love that!
This story will be the last story for this post as it’s already really long. It’s not about me really but rather about Ms Magi who I love and adore but who doesn’t really play any games. Ms Magi’s experience with gaming is limited to The Sims 4, some Daedalic Entertainment games (Deponia, Edna, Harvey’s, etc.), and (as of late) Among Us! As video games are a big part of my life, I guess, I wanted to introduce her into the medium, so I showed her a couple of games once, like Untitled Goose Game, Portal, Stardew Valley, and Slime Rancher. All of them are great games that are fairly beginner-friendly… She loved Untitled Goose Game as well as the latter two but as for Portal, she’d constantly get lost as she wasn’t used to the camera movement or the logic behind what the game wants her to figure out and how everything ties in together. Ms Magi is super smart but I guess to be able to play a game like Portal, you still need experience with puzzle games in general and the camera movement of 3D games. It was tricky for her but she liked the humour a lot and the concept of it. Ms Magi likes watching me play games and hearing me speak English, so she sometimes wants to see clips of my stream or watch a vod together, which I kind of find “eh” since I get embarrassed by my accent. I’m kind of always searching for games to play together and I may actually buy a second gamepad eventually so that we could play some titles in local-co-op eventually. I still need to find a solution for the audio as my PC doesn’t have speakers and as the Aux-input doesn’t work for whatever reason. At the same time, I only have one pair of headphones and the cable stuff is kind of making stuff hard to deal with. I’d love to share this part of my life with her more often and enjoy stuff together. We did play Bake n Switch together and she liked it… so I’m looking forward to showing her other stuff. Watching a stream on Twitch together has also been fairly enjoyable for her, especially as KingArgaroth is just a lovely bean.
Thus, this last story is basically about me introducing other people into gaming… which can be trickier at times.
So, yesterday, Wilhelm over at TAGN published a fantastic post full of bullet points on different topics in regards to streaming shows on services like Hulu, Disney+, Netflix, HBO, and so on. Check that post out! It’s great!
Then Bhagpuss made a post as well on the topic and used those bullet points to give their opinion on the same topic. Check their post out as well if you haven’t yet. Another great post!
Alas, that’s why I wanted to write about this topic and why I’m considering streaming shows via Netflix despite not liking subscription-models too much. Before I head into that… context:
I haven’t watched TV for about eight years now, really… I mean, I’ve watched shows via the internet and at times, I’d even just settle for YouTube videos, Anime or video games instead of watching a movie or a show on TV. There are a few reasons for that that I’ll get into later. Mostly since other media is more entertaining, anyway, in my opinion. For the most part, however, I’d opt-in for stuff that is available for free online instead of getting a Netflix subscription. I’m just hesitant about subscriptions because I usually don’t end up making full use of it… About five years ago, I got myself Spotify Premium to not have to download music onto my phone and ended up basically using it every day for hours upon hours. With Spotify, I’m making full use of my subscription since I listen to music all the time anyway. If I were to get into WoW, I probably wouldn’t be able to play it too much and would then regret the subscription. With Netflix, I wouldn’t watch enough shows to make it worth it. Alas, I ended up relying on watching shows on Netflix whenever I was at my parents’ since I can use my sister’s Netflix account to watch shows. Back to the post.
Not having to deal with commercials is pretty nice.
Absolutely. The reason why I have Spotify Premium is mostly the fact that I can use it offline as well but also the fact that there are no ads every two songs or so. Some ads on Spotify would go on for three minutes, promoting a song that I don’t like at all, which was annoying. With TV it’s similar: I don’t watch TV because I hated the 7-minute-ad-breaks during movies, every twenty minutes or so. It’s annoying and I don’t really get why. Not having to deal with that is really nice… It’s incredibly nice to watch a show whenever you want to while still supporting the creators of it with the subscription.
I still don’t like pay-per-view.
The only movies that I ever bought DVDs of were Nightmare Before Christmas, Frankenweenie, 9, Corpse Bride, and two copies of (500) Days of Summer. Yes, I own that last movie twice, mostly since I wanted to watch that movie again but didn’t have the DVD at my place, so I just ordered it. You can rent it for three bucks or just buy it for ten. Buying it twice is twenty bucks. Watching it four times is already more worth it on the DVD I bought than when rented. And I have a spare at my parents’ place in case I wanna watch it over there and didn’t bring it from my flat. Pay-Per-View is a failed concept in my opinion as I still have that DVD available to me no matter what happens to that account of mine. I mean… would you rent a game for one play-session only to be charged again when you start it up again next time?
There are too many streaming-services.
Yes. 100%. I’m thinking about getting Netflix so that I can watch some movies and shows I like on there… but not every show I wanna watch is on there as it’s somewhere else. Disney+ features a lot of Marvel stuff, for instance, so if a friend came over and wanted to watch that stuff, I’d have to have Disney+… and I don’t think I’ll get it anytime soon. In essence, it wouldn’t pay off for me personally as I’m not the biggest Star Wars fan and as I’m not the biggest Marvel fan either. I liked the Daredevil but I think that show is still on Netflix… and it got worse and worse after every season, so I stopped watching it eventually. There aren’t really any other Marvel shows that I’d watch apart from Agents of Shield… and even that one will probably never get watched.
I’d like it if there was a way for you to watch HBO shows on Netflix. I love Silicon Valley, for instance, but I’m not entirely sure if I’d like anything else on HBO really… Silicon Valley is a great show. If I was able to watch it on Netflix, I’d do that. Maybe Netflix would get a bit of money from HBO since they provided me with it and a lot of the money would go to HBO since they made the show. That kind of system or partnership between shows could work out quite well, I think. But then again, they are in competition, so they probably won’t do that.
And the problem with being on one service and “making full use of the subscription” is that you can’t really “make full use of it” when you also want to “make full use of” another subscription. I’m not sure if I’d ever subscribe to two different services at the same time, at least as a student.
Finding things is hard.
Netflix has a lot of shows. My Steam library has a lot of games. That doesn’t mean that you’ll always find the right thing to watch or play right away. “Die Qual der Wahl” is a German phrase that summarises that quite well. Having too many options results in you having a hard time choosing what to watch, which is annoying. Steam gives you a suggestion at times with the “Steam Play Next” shelf in the library’s homepage, which I find quite cool, as I’ve mentioned in a previous post. Netflix has a suggestion feature as well based on the shows that you watch but generally, it can be really hard to find shows to watch since you don’t have an “either-or” choice but rather an “either-or-or-…-or-or-or” choice with way too many shows which makes the choice even harder. On Steam, it at least is limited to games you own while Netflix just presents everything to you. Hence, I can see why that’s an issue and I’m glad that people are recommending shows on my discord, so at least I can fish for some shows on there or recommend shows to other people.
Weekly Releases vs. All-At-Once
Personally speaking, I’d rather have shows available All at Once! However, I can see how binging is quite unhealthy and how that shouldn’t be encouraged with cliffhangers in shows that make you want to go for “just another episode” or whatever. Having the next episode(s) available already means that there probably are spoilers out already but also that you won’t have to wait. When I watch Anime, I often watch shows that already are done. Alas, I can binge them. When I watch Airing Shows, I end up having to wait a week, which is a bit annoying… but I guess I can try and theory-craft with friends about the next episode, which is quite cool. There are, however, shows I really watch, so I binge watch and then it’s 8 am suddenly and my headspace is a mess and I just am tired but don’t want to ruin my sleep schedule which is kind of annoying.
Biases towards movies vs. shows
Wilhelm talks in his post about how a show feels like it’s “too long” to watch after a movie even though he spends probably the same amount of time watching four episodes on Netflix that evening anyways. I feel like that bias is there for everyone. A show usually is shorter and you can stop at any given time. A movie, however, is made in a less episodic way, resulting in you not being able to stop at any time, I think. I mean, there are three-hour-movies out there that don’t make any sense afterwards when you watch it after a day… or two… or whenever you get to it again. Usually, I end up making more time for movies than with shows only to use up more time with the shows compared to the movie. You can kind of estimate when you’ll end by watching a movie while you sometimes just feel like watching another episode after you just watched three or four.
Cut the Cord!
I really don’t watch TV. Wilhelm made a point about Sports but over here, at least, sports games often get broadcasted and streamed over the internet as well. Here in Germany, you still have to pay some fee for radio/tv/internet even when you don’t use any of those – “you have the opportunity to do it” after all, and you have to pay for that opportunity, I think… So, I don’t really have a reason to watch TV, especially with news, the weather, shows, movies and whatever else being available online already.
Internet problems suck!
Oh, tell me! It’s bad enough when my ping is high in games or when I’m dropping frames while streaming… but when the internet fails while watching a Stream on Twitch or a video on YT or a show on Netflix then that sucks super bad since you are invested in the show and suddenly have to do something else instead. Luckily, the neighbourhood at my parents’ and the neighbourhood at my dorm will both get better internet in 2021, so I’m excited about potentially streaming in 720p again on Twitch and watching more shows again!
Streaming at home > the cinema experience?
This one’s somewhat tricky. Watching a movie in the cinema/at the theatre is great a lot of the time… but as of late, I’ve been disliking it more and more whenever I thought back to all those bad experiences I’ve had with phones being used and being turned on super bright… or screaming babies… or chatty people… or people walking through the light, etc. Generally speaking, the experience can be so-so but I know that I want my kids to experience it for themselves for sure eventually when I have kids. I don’t want them to only know movies from TV/Netflix/DVDs… I mean, as a kid I loved the cinema. I can probably count the times I’ve been to the cinema on my fingertips, but I liked it most of the time during my childhood and not so much during recent years. Especially when you consider the price factor of it: Tickets and snacks are overpriced and you still don’t get a guaranteed “magical” experience depending on the people around you. Also, you still watch ads before the movie… Meanwhile, you get to have a great experience at home either way. It’s your own four walls, the people you love, you don’t have to wear pants, and you can stop any time to go to the toilet without missing anything… and as for snacks, you can have anything! I could have a can of Dr Pepper there… or a second one… or a third one… in the cinema, I wouldn’t be able to have Dr Pepper at all and if they did have it there it would cost way more than the store price.
There are still things not available.
A lot of Tim Burton movies, for instance, aren’t available on Netflix, which is weird… because they are great. A lot of older movies also can’t be watched on a lot of these services… and I don’t get why exactly that’s not a thing. At the same time, they are available in other countries, so using a VPN often is advised when it comes to Netflix and the like, which is something I personally don’t like too much… Why not make all languages, all subs and all shows/movies available to everyone and anyone? I mean, sure, there are countries that don’t allow stuff but just disable those over there!
Anyways, this is my (way too long) post on this topic. I again really recommend checking out Wilhelm’s post as it was the originator of all of this… and Bhagpuss’ post is also great, so check that post out!
What are your thoughts on the matter? Do you use Netflix, HBO, or whatever? Can you recommend one over the other or maybe give me some recommendations for shows? In that instance, name your favourite shows, if you want to. I’ll for one really liked Silicon Valley on HBO and I love American Vandal on Netflix! I can highly recommend both of those shows if you’re into comedy. I may actually grab Netflix for myself and try it out for a month or a few, depending on how I like it and how much I use it. I may even write a Stray Sheep or two about shows I watched and about shows that I’m watching. We’ll see!
This is not a review at all… I just want to fanboy about this show that Ms Magi’s father recommended to me and that I finally started to watch. You may ask: What is the show in question? Dark! – Like… it’s called “Dark”, on top of being “dark”. This post will not contain any spoilers at all until I say otherwise!
I just started watching it yesterday and already binged through the first season, ready to go for the second and the third one. If you haven’t watched it yet, I’d recommend checking it out without knowing anything about the story and just watching it. Go in completely blind.
Stuff I knew before starting to watch:
It plays in Germany.
It is Netflix’ first German-language original series.
Bonaparte’s “Melody X” apparently also is part of the soundtrack.
Actually, Dark has been on my list for quite a while. I love Bonaparte and alas, was aware of Melody X’ appearance in the show through that… Ms Magi’s father recommended it to me a year ago… a viewer from my Twitch chat recommended it to me a few months ago… and yesterday, I just felt like starting it up when I arrived at my parents and was able to confirm that my sister indeed still has a Netflix subscription.
I often have had the feeling that German forests and some German places have this general feeling of uneasiness and ominosity that could very well be used in a movie, of sorts… and well, Dark does that. The plot takes place in Winden… but it’s not taking place in the actual Winden that is about two hours from my hometown. Most of its episode were filmed in Brandenburg and parts of Berlin, so the town is fictional – that part doesn’t matter though. The important bit is that the show’s tone, visuals, score, and the whole premise is ominous and, well, dark. It’s great.
I love this show a lot due to its take on Time Travel and the influence of the concept of time on the human conscious. How does it change you when you meet yourself? How do characters connect? What happened to the missing kid? Questions over questions… and the more you pay attention, the more you are rewarded at the end of each season. I love it.
NO MORE SPOILERS FROM HERE ON OUT!
The show is sinister and really well-made. I love the premise and the plot. I love how it is complex and ambitious and how you have to pay a lot of attention to some of the details to be able to understand what’s going on later on… it’s challenging me and that’s what I like about it. The topic mentioned in the spoiler above this paragraph here is something that needs to be well-made but once you establish your cast of characters properly and explain their connections, you’re able to explore the topic more and end up in all kinds of places, which is just so great.
Alas, I love this show and am looking forward to watching more of it. It’s been a while since I binged shows with no regrets and it’s been a while since I’ve seen shows with this production value. The acting, the score, the visuals… Fantastic.
And well,… I’m not a fan of thrillers but this one has got me hooked, especially due to its sinister and, well, dark nature. I just love it and I love theorycrafting around it and can’t wait to talk to friends and Ms Magi’s father and other people about the show.
It feels weird to post again but to not be on my usual workplace. I haven’t seen my parents or my siblings in ages, and alas decided to visit them over the winter break. I isolated myself for three weeks before this to be 100% safe that I won’t contract it to my parents or whatever. The town I live in is considered a hotspot while there haven’t been any new cases in my hometown, so I feel quite safe over here and can get some rest over here over the holidays, while studying for exams and watching shows in the evenings. Still, not sitting at my desk is weird and it’s weird to live with six people now instead of just one flatmate… but it’s only for two weeks so I’m sure that I’ll manage somehow.
I hope you are safe over there and that you’re staying healthy over the holidays. Happy holidays to ya and a good start into 2021!
On July 15th, 2019, I introduced myself as a new blogger who just started and who was planning on reviewing games on here and write about gaming and non-gaming related stuff alike. This post here is to celebrate one year of blogging… just a bit late. Uh, I’ve been meaning to rewrite this draft a couple of times and then other stuff happened. On July 14th, I published my third post on the To The Moon Play Along that Naithin organised and while this post was due on the day after that, I ended up not publishing it yet because I had big plans for it and wanted to make it as great as possible. The next post that I published was the post I did on Hyper Scape and uh… yeah, then I procrastinated a lot… and now it’s nearly 2021.
Alas, don’t mind me as I post this post a few months late and as I “celebrate” one year of blogging… just a bit later.
So, what happened in one year of blogging?
Well, for the most part… Improvements! I changed my theme two times and played around with the colours and different options until I got to the blog and blog-layout that you can see today. I also started using Grammarly and started editing posts to reduce the reading time and enhance the quality a lot.
My longest post to date was my review on Moonlighter, featuring 21,897 characters and a total of 3,912 words spread across 52 paragraphs. The reason for the switch from long reviews (2k to 3k words) to short-ish reviews (~1k words, up to a maximum of 1.4k words) was mainly that I wouldn’t have lasted long if I spent more time on writing posts than on studying. I am still able to write up reviews as much as I want to but I don’t explain every mechanic, the control scheme, every detail or gimmick in the game. I end up talking more about what I like and dislike about a game instead of explaining what you, as a potential player, will inevitably see for yourself. This was a change for the better.
Over a bit more than a year, I published 64 reviews as well as 31 posts on The Lookout Post. I also ended up going for 50 posts in the Gaming Journal, the category where I talk about other games and where I do first-impressions, and stuff. I’ve amassed a total of 87 Stray Sheep in this time as well and managed to finish nine MonHunLogs and six posts on Twitch-related stuff. I’m actually quite happy with how the reviews turned out and how much I’ve managed to write in this time.
Alas, I’ve published a total of 234 posts with 42 drafts sitting here, ready to be edited and worked on,… eventually.
My most successful posts were the following (excluding the home page):
There have been a whopping 347 comments on my blog that were not by spam-bots. If you include pings and answers, we get a total of 461 comments. On top of that, we hit 107 followers on WordPress with the very first follower being Naithin who followed on July 17th, 2019.
Through Twitch and WordPress, I was able to hit 183 followers on Twitter, although most views probably come through referrals and discord anyways. I’ve been more than happy with the amount of traffic has come to Indiecator, especially as I’m only at the beginning of my journey on here.
As time went on, I’d often start a new series or something like that and would then see how long I’d stay interested in it. My Viridi-post with different bloggers as plants and that kinda stuff ended up being well-received but I ended up not getting another post done in the series as I, honestly, didn’t find any more time to read posts. I still read posts every now and then whenever they pop up in my Twitter or WordPress timeline but lately, it’s been a bad habit of mine to not comment or like as much anymore. University’s still keeping me quite busy but I’ve managed to at least stay relevant for Google and other sites, to the point where I even got featured in some “top 40 Indie bloggers” on feedspot (spot 11!)… I need to socialize more on WordPress and get to know more people but that post ended up getting trashed.
As for other posts that ended up getting trashed, I never got back to my review on Ori and the Blind Forest or the series of posts that I wanted to do on Destiny 2 Raids… at this point in time, it’s probably time to delete some of the drafts as the raids in question got vaulted.
Seeing that my post on Destiny 2 is still doing fairly good, I may post more on that topic. I have four more posts in line that have nothing to do with vaulted raids but I haven’t gotten around to editing them just yet and uh… they may not be the most relevant right now.
My post on Self-Promotion on Twitch is also still getting traffic, so I gotta post more in the Bleeding Purple category that I set up!
My post on Raid Shadow Legends is also doing really well, still, so maybe it’s time that I finish editing my post on AFK Arena and that I hit “publish” for once…
Either way, as for reviews (the main piece of my blog), I’d like to mention that there are still plenty of titles to go through. My Steam library alone, features 451 Indie games that I haven’t played at all yet, as well as a hundred or so that I have played already but haven’t reviewed yet. On top of that, there are some Kickstarter and EA games that I’ve backed and supported, that I need to write about in the near future before they get finished.
My Steam library has been growing lately as well but I did manage to play through some titles in the Late to the Party category as well as on Stream and through my reviews. There are still about 942 unplayed games, though, so, I hope that I’ll have plenty of time to review games in the future as well.
Alas, Indiecator went from “the guide through the Indie jungle” to a “weird but charming” blog where I don’t fangirl too much about Dr Pepper anymore and instead, talk about Indie games and Streaming and games in general really… It’s been a ton of fun to write about the things I love so far and I’m looking forward to getting better at it in the future as well.
Stuff that I want to do in the next few years of blogging:
So, Quietschisto dared to tag us for the Sunshine Blogger Award and I wanted to make a post about that one but then I got reminded that a certain geeky gal called Megan actually tagged me for the Mystery Blogger Award… in March! Oh no, we’re super late! Meghan, thanks for the tag. I honestly forgot about it because other stuff came up!
The rules are a bit of the usual, I guess:
Thank the blogger and link to them (which should be a given)
Display the award logo on your blog (which I’m gonna do in this post)
Mention the creator of the award + link
List the rules
Tell your readers three things about yourself
Answer five questions from the nominator
Ask your nominees any five questions of your choice, including one weird or funny question
Nominate 10 to 20 bloggers
Notify the bloggers by leaving a comment on their blog (though, I’d just message them where possible)
Share the link to your best post
Now, as far as the award goes… I’m just going to copy-paste this from Meghan’s site as it seems to be a quote on her end as well.
“According to the creator, Okoto, “Mystery Blogger Award” is an award for amazing bloggers with ingenious posts. Their blog not only captivates; it inspires and motivates. They are one of the best out there, and they deserve every recognition they get. This award is also for bloggers who find fun and inspiration in blogging, and they do it with so much love and passion.”
I’m not sure if my blog captivates, inspires or motivates, but I sure do know that I love blogging and that it brings me fun, joy and entertainment. I’m really bad at taking compliments and I have yet to get better at that but since that last part is there, I thought… you know… might as well go for that. 🙂
Three things about me:
My eyesight is really bad. That’s mostly because of me growing really fast as a kid and my eyes just couldn’t keep up or something… and eventually, it started to reflect in my eyesight getting worse and worse. Right now I’m at -3.75 and -4.00 diopters and effectively, I could get it fixed but I’m scared of potential risks involved in surgery/laser-therapy and hence, I just rock these glasses until it gets better on its own or until I have time and guts to do that laser thing.
I’m insanely bad at introducing myself and telling people something about myself. This may come as no surprise since I did that post, ages ago, and now I’m doing this thing here and the “three things about me” are turning a bit meta and boring… but yeah, I’m super bad at this kind of stuff, so I’m just listing the first/best three things I could come up with.
My favourite colour is purple and I nearly would have gone to Prom in a purple suit… but then I found this Bordeaux red suit and fell in love with it… I looked fabulous if I do say so myself, although I would have been the best-looking person on the Prom even with the purple suit. Now, my self-esteem is getting better overall but it’s still hard to say that kinda stuff about myself and like actually mean it… although, I know that all of my fellow students were boring and had these lame blue and black suits… this is a party and not a funeral, nerds.
Now, if I were to link my “best post”, I wouldn’t actually know which post to link. In terms of “best-performing” post, I’d clearly have to go with my review on Fall Guys that did get an overwhelming amount of views in the first couple and days and is still outperforming all of my other posts. But I actually don’t like that post too much as it was a bit rough and just kind of turned into a review after a while… and I don’t know. My “best post” would probably be more like my review on Outer Wilds, Before I Forget or Girl By The Sea. I really enjoyed writing those and I noticed that I did a “good job” with those reviews while I was editing them. Hence, uh, there’s that!
The Questions that Meghan answered were quite interesting although I find the obsession with aliens a bit concerning… But let’s get into her questions:
What game or gaming moment made you laugh the hardest?
I honestly can’t remember the last time that I really “laughed out loud”/LOL’d at a game. Hades, however, has a few nice bits and pieces here and there in the conversations that I found quite fun. There’s also this one scene in DMC: Devil May Cry where Dante is facing this big giant spider-guy and they just say “fuck you” to each other for a solid minute. “Fuck you.” – “No, fuck you!” – “No, fuck you.” – “No, fuck you!!!!” – or something like that, which I found quite funny at the time. And then there are some badass-ish moments in Serious Sam that I found quite nice… generally, I kind of laugh because of certain moments but usually, I don’t really “laugh out loud”.
Which character (games, book, shows, etc.) would be your best friend and why?
Now, this is a tough question as well since I don’t think it’s a good idea to get more friends. In our day and age, it’s hard enough to maintain healthy and close relationships to people already… and now you want me to add another character to my five offline friends? I don’t think that’s gonna work too well… unless of course, it’s Orpheus from Hades or Echidna from Re:Zero kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu’s 2nd Season (Part 1). Orpheus would be a very chill friend to be around. We could just hang around and be all melancholic, depressed and romantic together. Potentially, a song or two by him could lift the mood at times…
BUT I don’t think we should choose a character strictly for our own benefits! No, no! Instead, we should consider them friends and think about how we could help them. I could cuddle with Orpheus and give him feedback in regards to his new writings… and we could go for a drink together for some inspiration or I could listen to him about him and Euridice and his love and all of that. I’d like to help him.
Meanwhile, Echidna would just be cool to hang around with. She’s an interesting character that knows a ton (meaning that we’d be able to talk about a lot, potentially) and we could have tea parties together, minus body fluids. I’d love to share my tea collection with more friends! With the pandemic and all of that, I sadly don’t exactly get the chance to share my tea collection with others…
Alas, I’d be able to grant Echidna my knowledge and listen to her and talk to her and stuff, which is extra cool since I’m alive and she’s dead. Uhm, I would also be able to provide her with some of my favourite teas here including a liquorice-mint-tea and a green-tea with vanilla in it! That’s gotta be better than body fluids! I feel like that could work out quite well.
What life skill(s) have you learned from playing video games?
I’d say none but I guess that’d be a lie. After a lot of thinking, I’d go for “speaking and typing English” although a lot of that came from media consumption in general as well as school… so movies, shows, music, poems, books, games, and lessons all helped me learn English. Through video games, I connected with other people and was able to share my thoughts on things and talk to them and learn more, obviously. By getting to know a lot of people from all over the world, I got to talk to more people – using my English skills while also improving them. In the end, I wouldn’t say that video games taught me English… rather, they improved my English a bunch or they gave me opportunities to learn more and get better.
Alas, I didn’t really get any better at any life skill(s) thanks to video games, unless you accept my previous answer which shouldn’t count since it’s not through video games alone but all of that stuff.
How did you pick your gaming username (or forum username)?
Oh, this is fun. I made two posts on this. In this one, I mention it a bit below while also mentioning a discussion about gender-/race-locked classes. And in this one, I just talk about my username in general.
We’re gonna hang out today, what do you pick for us to do?
Oh, darn, Meg… I’m super late. I hope you don’t mind that I’m nearly seven months late for this but… nothing special, it’s a bit late after all. Tea time for sure! We could also stream some co-op games on Twitch together (since I gotta be live soon anyways) if you bring your own controller. 🙂 I could also bake something real quick or make us some food and, since you don’t live nearby, I guess you take the bed and I’ll sleep on that seat-like thingy over there or at my GF’s. Does that work? When will ya be around? Any food preferences?
Apart from that, coffee in the morning and since you won’t get a plane back to St. Louis anytime soon (heh, pandemic), we could go to a bar or a few in tomorrow evening and visit the botanic gardens, the museums around here, and some other interesting places tomorrow. Feels like the standard program for “tourists” and visitors from other places.
Oh, I also gotta show you the monorail. Wuppertal is famous for it. You’re gonna love it.
My questions for the nominees:
You have to ban one game for eternity. This game shall never be played or watched again and nobody is allowed to talk about it. Which game do you pick?
How was your day? What have you been up to? Hope you’re well. 🙂
If you could take any vehicle/plane/etc. from any game/show/book/whatever to use in our world, what would you pick and where would you go?
This one’s weird! It’s not a question… it’s an answer! “No, but the raisins certainly belong to this office.” – Find the question that this answer answers!
What’s your favourite Indie title that you personally love that nobody seems to know?
And, I don’t usually do tags all that often but when I do, it’s a long post. Hope you liked this one.
As for the nominated bloggers, I appreciate these bloggers mentioned above a lot. I don’t read as many blog posts lately compared to the past few months… but now that my last exam is all done and dusted, I’ll be able to get back to that again, hopefully catching up with all of these cool and entertaining people (and Frosti and Quietschisto). 🙂 While there are a lot more bloggers out there that I appreciate and read a bunch, I didn’t want to nominate too many as I’d end up running out of bloggers to tag for that other tag post that I gotta do… I mean 10 are already a ton… Alas, these are the ones that I read the most lately and I gotta do Quietschisto’s tag as well and will nominate others for that one. 😀
Edit: On publish, I didn’t check Meg’s name’s spelling and ended up writing “Meghan” instead of “Megan”. This is now fixed.
While originally, there were plans for a whole bunch of posts and the Promptapalooza prompts on top of that, I ended up still not getting anything done ever since I arrived at my parents. Hence, here’s a catchup post.
First things first, why am I not getting anything done?
Honestly, I’d say that I’m missing my usual work atmosphere or rather the physical work station that I need to write blog posts. I’m currently at my parents’ and while I originally planned to blog in the morning when my parents are at work and when my siblings are at school – or rather when I’m all alone at home… I noticed that there was a huge dip in productivity for me. I’d end up starting to write a post but it wouldn’t feel right. The fact that my OCD would give me a headache because I don’t have my usual dual-screens, I don’t have my desk lamp, I don’t have my usual mug with my usual tea, and the fact that I have to write on a laptop in a completely different home in a completely different state of Germany… all of that combined resulted in me being super lazy and unproductive in terms of blogging. I tried creating a bunch of posts but none of them felt right.
My “I’m so excited post!” ended up getting postponed over time… I had to finish my prompt about the username question since I signed up for that but I didn’t get any of the other prompts done, just yet, mainly since I’m not at my flat. I’ll effectively be able to write again when I’m at my home again… the plan was to leave for “home” on this Sunday but since my aunt is visiting this weekend and only leaving on Sunday, I’ll have to stay here until Monday… and even then, I don’t know if I’ll be away in the morning or if we’re leaving in the evening or whatever’s the plan.
Why is it so important to me that I’m in my own four walls?
Frankly, I don’t know. I’m used to it. I can’t really stay here at my parents’ for too long since I start to get anxious.
On that note, I don’t want to talk about this more personal and more emotional stuff on my blog anymore. I think I’ll move The Stray Sheep and all the personal crap over to my fresh and new blog, the Lich Diary, where I try to describe how I deal with my anxieties, insecurities, personal issues and how I’ll (try to) overcome them. If you’re into that, check that out, if not… it’s all fun and *games* over here, haha.
Note: This blog link up here… is gonna be mentioned a lot over the course of this blog post… so, uh… “see above” refers to that.
But seriously, I can’t really work or study here. The work environment is different here and I don’t feel at home at all. On top of that, there is construction work happening outside and I fucking hate the fact that it’s that loud. Even with in-ears and my music turned up to the max, I still hear that construction work and everything… super annoying.
So, what’s up with this post?
Essentially, I’ve seen plenty of people do the catch-up posts instead of actually writing the prompts. Instead of writing a whole post dedicated to only one prompt, they have their own normal posts at times and either pick out one or two prompts here and there that they write about… or they just write a sentence or two for each prompt but all of it in one post.
And I’m not judging that. I would have done all the prompts in 31 posts… but life’s a bitch and not everything goes as planned, so here we are with a catch-up post. It’s a smart idea to have one like these in there.
Effectively, I’ll write about most of the prompts in this one and try to link to the blogs that host them and I hope you enjoy that and I hope that it’s alright that I’m doing it like that.
This is a prompt that I want to dedicate a whole post to but I didn’t do it yet since I can’t take pictures of my desk and everything since I’m not at home. So, I’ll do a post in the future about my PC specs, my set-up, my preferences, my desk and how I create certain posts and stuff instead… but for now, I’d like to say that I have two monitors set up on a desk that is way too small for two monitors… but it works so far. It’s a bit cramped I guess when I do stuff for uni and have a notepad on top of it and have to write on physical paper while doing research and stuff… but more often than not, I’m doing that kind of stuff at our library on campus and I resort to Open Office and Word on my PC when I’m at home. Between the two 1080p monitors is a desk lamp that usually provides light for me in the evening, for the night is dark and full of terrors. I tend to blog in the evenings, so naturally, that desk lamp is turned on.
Next to my desk, I have another small and rather thin desk that I use for my tea setup where a small candle is providing heat to a pot of tea… and my teacup is on that separate table as well since I don’t want to spill liquids on my keyboard… again. Essentially, that’s the physical workspace that I use for creative stuff as well as normal work. I also stream there and game there and all of that, but again, I’ll talk about that in a different post.
I follow a bunch of indie game devs on Twitter and get excited when I see their dev blog posts or WIP-screenshots and animations and whatever… and eventually, they release their full game, which is just glorious. The last game that I was super-hyped about was Children of Morta, I think, which I’ve been following for about three years… and before that, I was even more hyped about Risk of Rain 2 as I loved the first game ever since it came out… and since I followed Hopoo Games’ dev blog for ages ever since they announced wanting to create a sequel to Risk of Rain 1 but in 3D… and that sounded just rad. Over time, while following their dev blog, I also learnt about one of their other projects, Deadbolt… and it was just glorious when I first played it, though the review is still in the works.
Apart from that, meeting certain people can be quite exciting and actually doing something with close friends of yours can be really good. A close friend of mine and I haven’t seen each other since March, so we just met up like last year and were gazing at the night sky in hopes of seeing some shooting stars, the other day, while drinking a bit and talking about life, love, dreams and fear, and all of that stuff. On top of that, I also get excited when I go to live concerts, though that’s a bit rough right now in the midst of a pandemic. The last time I went to a live concert was a year ago when I went to a Crywank concert nearby and actually go to talk to Dan from Crywank and I even got an autograph, a photo with him and I was able to hug him. Was just awesome.
And well, food… I love trying new food and new recipes and when it tastes good afterwards, I’m happy about that… or when I tried that insect patty at a burger chain once… I was excited about it… and then it arrived and it was just awesome.
I could go on about my grandfather and some of my neighbours and my uncle and all of that stuff but that’s something for my private blog (mentioned above). I guess a better answer for this prompt would be a lot of musicians that I followed over the years. Crywank, for instance, had a great influence on me when I got bullied. Arctic Monkeys, for instance, helped me a bunch after a few of my break-ups. Bonaparte were always a jammer for my longest train rides. Rainbow Kitten Surprise, Bakers Eddy, Amarante, The Amazons, Chris Christodoulou, Anberlin, Badflower, AnnenMayKantereit, Arcade Fire, and many other artists always provided me with great music while I was getting into bad headspaces or when I wasn’t doing too well and needed to cheer up or when I had good times. I feel like the music that I listened to, the games I played, the shows I watched, often lead to me feeling better when I was down.
And obviously, my best friend, her boyfriend, and my girlfriend are probably the biggest influences in my life. They are people that make me want to be a better person or rather a better human overall. I want to be the best possible “me” that I could be.
As we’ve established earlier this month, I wouldn’t say that I’m part of any core fandoms… but at the same time, I did and still do watch a bunch of Anime and I did and still do read a lot of Manga so I guess that that’s one of my “core fandoms”. Hence, my earliest memory of that probably is when I watched InuYasha, Naruto, One Piece, and some other shows in FreeTV back in the day… although I only watched it sporadically and often wouldn’t watch all of the episodes due to me not catching all of them. My absolute favourite show back in the day was Detective Conan (I think, the show’s called “Case Closed” in English).
When I first started sitting down and watching Anime, I remember really liking Mirai Nikki, Sword Art Online and Attack Titan… until I watched actual good shows… then I noticed that the “good shows” I knew weren’t actually all that good… and that was somewhat disappointing. And Season after Season the quality seemed to drop with some good shows occasionally showing up… but most of the newer shows seem to just be average at best, which is quite disappointing. Oh well.
I have a few reviews lined up that I always wanted to finish writing but never could do. One of them is on Dungeon of the Endless… but whenever I start up the game, I notice that I want to rewrite my review… so I do that and go through the editing process… and then I play the game again for another run… only to notice that I’m not doing this game any justice with my review…. so I rewrite it and then play it again and then notice that I am still not doing it any justice. I just love that game too much.
The other post that I’m always postponing is my anniversary post… it’s not done yet. It’s a month late. It will have to wait until I’m finished with it… once I’m at my flat again.
I don’t like this prompt all that much. It wants me to finish a post on the spot when it’s not ready. It’s postponed for a reason and it will be postponed until I’m either back at my flat and happy with it… or until someone puts a gun to my head to make me finish that post (which is quite unlikely).
I’d love to meet my grandmother but she died before I was born. I’d love to meet one of my neighbours again but he died just last year. I already met Dan from Crywank, so I don’t need to do that necessarily… I guess, there are some bloggers like Mr Peril that I’d love to meet eventually but since the UK and Germany aren’t too far away, there is always a possibility for that. I’d also love to meet Naithin eventually although that’s gonna be a bit harder to accomplish since he’s a lot farther away… and well, there are a bunch of streamers from the US that I look up to that are quite far away like XilentFlex or Nickodimas or Tugboet… Oh well, maybe in the future. As long as they live on the same planet as me, it should be possible, right? 🙂 And of course, I look up to a lot of other streamers and bloggers and people in general, but I can’t possibly mention all of them, right? I mean, I could, but it would take a lot of time that I don’t have and I’d forget someone either way, right?
Oh, that’s a good question. There are games that I tend to 100% when the 100%-completion seems achievable… but when it seems too fiddly or too far away, I tend to just stray away and move on. Often, I end up drifting away from Open World titles, for instance, or I just finish the main storyline + some of the side quests before moving on to a different game when I’m bored of it. Similarly, some projects go on for ages with no end in sight (like this blog… hopefully…) but also short-lived projects that die before I know it (like my tomato plant, Felix… RIP).
I love reading plays, poetry and tragedies. Apart from that, I sometimes do write short stories and poetry though I don’t publish them too often. As already mentioned, I enjoy good shows and also anime, cartoons and manga. I used to be part of our school’s Drama group and later our university’s Drama group but since I have to focus more on my university studies now, I don’t really have the time to go to all the rehearsals and stuff. Alas, I’m currently mostly doing the blog stuff, streaming, and occasionally reading or watching a show in my free time. My hobbies really stay in the realm of my niche currently since every other hobby of mine either required too much time (like my science fair projects or my Drama club rehearsals) or I just couldn’t make a lot of time for them (like poetry or reading in general). I also used to do some martial arts stuff for quite some time but also had to stop that due to a shift in priorities. I plan on maybe doing Jiu-Jitsu or potentially Muay Thai again, eventually, though that depends on my schedule again and the people there as well as the price, so uh… I’ll see.
There are a lot of great antagonists out there but my absolute favourite is probably either Cave Johnson from Portal 2… or Virgil from Lightmatter… or Handsome Jack from Borderlands 2/Borderlands: The Pre-Sequel.
Cave Johnson and Virgil strike the same note of company bosses that tried to achieve greatness but failed to do so and ended up walking down a dark path (hehe)… and they’re crazy but not too crazy, which I really adore about them. Since Virgil is supposed to be a rival of Cave and since the games play in the same universe, I feel like it’s understandable that I like them both in the same way.
And Handsome Jack was one of the first villains I got to know in video games that had some actual depth to their character. I felt pity for him and somewhat understood him at some point and the reasoning as to why he’s… like that… he’s also a great character, very charismatic and… handsome… I may be lowkey crushing on him here and there but I really love his voice actor (who just randomly improvised about bretzels during some of the lines? Like… that’s awesome!). Honestly, this is easily my favourite. Fuck Virgil. Fuck Cave. They’ll share Spot 2.
…and I’d like to name a female character here for inclusivity but I can’t exactly remember any other antagonists overall. GLaDOS, for instance, is a victim and not a villain. And more often than not villains tend to be male and not female. Recently, I played through Destroy All Humans! and the main antagonist, first off, didn’t feel like “the main antagonist”… and secondly, it wasn’t a good “main antagonist” that I’d call “my favourite”. This doesn’t have to do with sexism or anything like that… the reveal that Silhouette is female just didn’t have anything to do with the game and didn’t seem surprising or whatever… it was just “eh”. I guess I can write a whole post on whether or not gender matters when it comes to antagonists or protagonists, so look out for that.
While I certainly feel like a lot of games deserve a second chance to do stuff better… I don’t think it’s necessary to rewrite them or to remake them. Remakes and Remasters usually lure you in for the sake of nostalgia, like the recent “Destroy All Humans!” remake, and then they end up disappointing you after you cannot refund them anymore. Two hours in, I still had fun and enjoyed myself with it… Three hours in, I got frustrated occasionally… After 11 hours I was done with the game, despite having paid 30€ for it when it effectively offered me 15-20€ worth of content… at most… I shouldn’t have bought it at full price (or rather, I shouldn’t have gotten excited and pre-ordered it). Lesson learned, I’ll write a bad review on it because it’s absolutely not worth the full price and it’s super frustrating and has a bunch of issues that they didn’t fix.
I feel like a remaster or a remake should introduce at least some improvement to its gameplay systems, some quality of life changes, some additional content without taking away from its original gameplay formula. Most of the games I love and play regularly, don’t really need a remade or remastered version, because they’re good games. I’m excited for the new Left 4 Dead 2 Update that is coming out soon… but I doubt that it’s in line with the prompt if I go on and rant about bad remakes and bad design choices and bad purchases on my end. I’ll dedicate a whole post to this topic, eventually.
I have a lot of fears that I’ll eventually cover on my personal blog (again, see above). The only fears that kind of effect my “content” are probably the fear of missing out, the fear of not fitting in, and the fear of not standing out. While that may be contradictory, I don’t want to be “just another gaming blog” or “just another review blog” or “just another indie blog” as that would result in me being or becoming boring. While I blog because it’s fun, I obviously also want to grow, so that my reviews get read and so that people get to play some true indie gems. But I also don’t want to stand out too much with an opinion that people don’t like, as that could get me “cancelled”. I don’t really believe that “cancel culture” is a thing… but I also am scared about it… Again, see above. I’ll write more about that on the other blog. And as far as FOMO goes, I don’t want to miss out on some lovely interactions with other bloggers, so I try to read their posts and I try to post about certain topics that are popular, at times, again for the sake of growth.
But while those fears exist, I’m not exactly anxious about a lot of the things there. I tend to ignore them and do my own thing… even if that’s not always the easiest thing, I know that it’s the best thing to do for me and my health.
There used to be a blog called peteback (can’t link it since it doesn’t exist anymore) that did essentially a similar thing to me here… review games and shows and write about their hobbies and I really liked that. And then I started my own blog.
Well, when everything just started, I ended up blogging as per usual. I already was done with all of my exams, so I had more free time and ended up participating in Blapril while also publishing 45 posts in total during that time! While I was streaming three times a week before that, I ended up changing my schedule a bit to have four streams per week since people are now at home and since those people needed a place to hang out at or rather a place to entertain themselves at. The pandemic hasn’t ended yet and Germany is on its way to a second lockdown (Covidiots, hooray!), so I may actually stick to the four-stream-schedule for quite some time… and I honestly, really like it.
With less social interactions and with me not going out as much, though, I ended up feeling less productive and I even got into this weird headspace that a lot of people were talking about already. More often than not, I’d end up posting less or less frequently… and eventually, Uni@Home started and I had my online classes which kept me busy so that lead to fewer posts.
But then I picked it up again and once I’m back home, I’ll be able to post more frequently again.
In the end, while the pandemic is bad for a lot of people… it ended up benefitting the gaming industry as more people at home meant more people to play games and more profits from games that people at home want to play (the maths add up!) – alas, content creators also benefitted from this as there were more people watching streams or reading blog posts or doing all of that… but due to me not feeling too well at times, my stream quality ended up dropping a bit again, so that resulted in a drop in views and overall, fewer people watching.
Again, once I’m back home again, I’ll work on that. I’ve got a blog post lined up for that as well for the Live in Purple category (name to change) and I’m looking forward to writing about issues I’ve faced while streaming and my advice for people that are starting out on Twitch or that are new to all of this. Again, more posts to come and more stuff in the drafts and, ugh, I’m sitting at 54 drafts, right now, despite this post going out soon…
This is a relatively easy prompt to answer. My mobile phone, my computer and my internet router.
I can’t stay in touch with the world and what’s going on without access to the internet… and for access to the internet, I need either my mobile phone or my PC… and obviously, I need my internet access/router. When I’m offline, I get to read more books but overall, I end up struggling due to FOMO… and while books are great and all of that, I love playing games and watching shows and watching YouTube videos, so that kind of ended up being a big part of my free time activities.
Honestly, I don’t think there are many things that I would have wanted to know beforehand… Well, the existence of Grammarly (#notsponsored). I would have checked my grammar and spelling and all of that in my first few posts… and I’ll fix that soon… if I remember.
Uh,… the Blaugust community? I don’t know. I’m not a part of many communities and the ones that I am a part of usually don’t have the sense of community that the Blaugust community has. I actually feel like I’m a part of something when I talk to other Blaugustans and when I participate in the events and stuff. I’d love to play some games with more people there but timezones and schedules and all of that is hard to get around… but we’ll manage it somehow.
And yeah, when I need help or advice, I’m able to rely on others there. Can highly recommend the Blaugust community. 100% not biased!
Let’s go with music then. I sometimes have some very busy and very bad days full of shitty people (again, coming soon on the other blog, see above) and when I get home, I just fall into my bed and lay down for a while. Then I take a shower, pop a can of Dr Pepper, put in my ear-plugs and enjoy my music for a bit while sitting on the balcony… In the winter it’s the same thing but inside and while browsing blogs or whatever.
or just my “favourite songs” on Spotify that include all kinds of stuff
And yeah, that’s essentially all of the Blaugust Promptapalooza prompts done in one day. I know I’m a bit early but I wanted to have all of them done by the end of the month and Monday is gonna be hectic, so I don’t know if I’ll be able to post them by then. Apart from that, I haven’t posted in quite some time, so I wanted to give out a sign of life before continuing with the usual frequency next month. 🙂
Hope you liked this one.
This post is part of the Blaugust 2020 event. Wanna know more about it? Then check out my post on it or Bel’s post where he also linked everyone who’s participating! Be sure to check out the others as well!
This post is part of the Blaugust 2020 event. Wanna know more about it? Then check out my post on it or Bel’s post where he also linked everyone who’s participating! Be sure to check out the others as well!
Alas, the five-fact-list is starting now… This one should be not too depressing!
Fact 1: I’m getting better at cooking.
This should be no surprise since I’ve lived alone for nearly two years now (The 3rd of September marks the beginning of the third year!) but I actually am getting better at that cooking business.
Over time, I’m really good at knowing what spices and what things are missing in dishes and I’m very good at spicing up veggies, for instance. I don’t have too many mishaps anymore with too much salt or too much pepper and am also getting better at cooking meat through to certain points.
That’s something that I’ve been excited about lately. After all, food is important but it should also taste good and since I love cooking for other people, including friends and my girlfriend, I want them to enjoy their food as well.
The things I work on right now is getting faster and more confident with the knives and actually being able to create dishes that look good.
The latter is somewhat of a bad habit of mine where I don’t care about the look of the food if it’s food for “only” me. I’ll eat it regardless of how it looks… but I wouldn’t want to take a dump on other people’s plates and serve it to them, so I’m trying to get better at actually making it look good. For that, I tend to take a look at different veggies and their colours and stuff to essentially balance out the colour palette. Before cooking them, I tend to boil them for a bit before putting them into cold water… “to blanch” veggies is very good to stop them from cooking too much and losing their colour, which is important in the case of sweet potatoes who turn brown instead of orange… or beans that lose a lot of their green. You can also peel off tomato skins using that method.
Hence, I go through a bit more of an effort to make the actual dish look good. Forming the rice is also really nice… experimenting with the look and presentation of the sauce on the plate… that kinda stuff.
The former thing about knives is a bit of a fear of mine. Before I started my blog, I accidentally stabbed myself with a knife into the left hand. So, now, I tend to be super scared of using knives since I don’t want to cause another red wedding in my flat, worrying everyone and passing out on the floor and stuff.
To get better at knife-work, I try to challenge myself while cutting up veggies and to try and filet meat easier while also trying out different techniques… overall, it’s a process and I’m excited about getting better at it.
Fact 2: I hate tier lists.
While maybe surprising, I hate tier lists like this one. I don’t enjoy writing about something without connecting different dots in some way together. Lists don’t have anything to do with knife-work or food. Shopping lists are handy but as a post? I’d hate that! So, let’s try and get this over with…
Maybe, it’s a bit of an ego-issue but I tend to devalue posts like “top 20 games budgets” that essentially represent a five-minute Google search… Obviously, these posts also take work… obviously, they are also a time investment for the author. But I just don’t like them. My list right now already took more time to write than their post over there – and yet, it’s content produced for the masses. Stuff, that people enjoy and like.
I hate it. I devalue it and I doubt that’s a bad thing either. It’s just opinion that I don’t rate posts about facts or lists or whatever highly.
I’ll hate this post, even if it probably does a lot better than my other posts.
Fact 3: I enjoy anime.
This one is probably no surprise after the manga review that I did on Girl By The Sea or after talking about Necrobarista and Milky Way Prince.
Generally, I wouldn’t consider myself a “fan” as the fandom consists of weebs and self-proclaimed “otakus” that constantly use at least one Japanese word per sentence… and I also don’t like a lot of the gatekeeping and hate that is going on in the fandom… and the sexism, bigotry and double standards… and the harassment of cosplayers… and the number of people thirsting over girls while obviously being toxic assholes… yeah, I don’t want to be part of that community.
But at the same, I guess I’m a “fan” since I enjoy a fair amount of anime and watched a fair amount myself so far and since I still actively watch shows whose episodes come out every week… it’s just that I don’t enjoy all of the fandom-aspects of it. I talked about it for a bit in the fandom-post a while back… But there are a lot of things that I’ve left uncommented…
Fact 4: My favourite numbers are 17 and 19.
Honestly, I don’t know why people would choose any other numbers… 19 is my absolute favourite number, so I had the habit of using it a lot when I created exercises for students of mine… but sometimes, when they were about to notice, I’d use (the inferior… but also really pretty) 17 to confuse them. They are both prime numbers as well, which is quite cool!
A past professor of mine really liked 15 and 28. What a weirdo.
And a friend of mine really liked 5/7, though I can understand that he liked that number a lot…
…I really hope that I meet normal friends when I study English studies. I really hope that we can talk about normal stuff… my math friends were weird and they made me even weirder.
Fact 5: I used to do Kendo, Iaido, Iodo and Muay Thai.
Okay, the latter was something that I initially wanted to do… but I ended up not being able to since I moved away shortly afterwards… but I did train Kendo (The Way of the Sword), Iaido (The Way of the Drawing of the Sword), and Iodo (The Way of the Stick) for a bit more than a year.
It was a lot of fun and helped me with a lot of issues from my posture to my self-discipline to anger-management, I guess. I really enjoyed it when I passed one of the exams, the 6th Kyu (it’s the first thing you do and it goes down to the 1st Kyu and then you get the 1st Dan, all the way up to the 6th – at least in Germany).
Quite often, we’d travel somewhere as well to learn more about other schools and techniques and we’d also have joint exercises with other schools and dojos. Once, we had a workshop of sorts with other dojos of other martial arts and we were able to experience some more Iaido taught to us by a 4th Dan who passed the exam for the 5th in Japan (!) but didn’t accept it since he felt that he didn’t deserve it yet. I even got to learn a bit of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and we did some exercises on Kung Fu, or specifically the Pak Sao techniques.
Sadly, it didn’t work out with that since I had to work, I had my girlfriend at the time, school stuff, the training, and lots more going on. In the end, I had to make the right call and prioritize something…
When I had less work, I wanted to train something again, and Muay Thai seemed like a cool thing that I could enjoy, mainly since my ex-girlfriend at the time talked a lot about it. My long legs were quite optimal for it since I had the necessary speed and height to kick people’s head without them reaching me but sadly, I couldn’t practice it too much… Once the “Rona” stops, I may actually pick it up again and start over. I would have loved to do Iaido or Iodo again but I don’t have my old equip anymore…
Blaugust Prompt 11 about my physical creative workspace is… in the works… but I want to post pictures that I can’t get right now… I’m not there after all. Hence, we’re writing about Prompt 12 instead, for now, which is hosted by SDWeasel over at USS! The next post in line is by Jen over here. Check her out. (Usually, this would be at the end, but in this case, that’s not possible at all with how the post is set up and written.)
This post is part of the Blaugust 2020 event. Wanna know more about it? Then check out my post on it or Bel’s post where he also linked everyone who’s participating! Be sure to check out the others as well!
“What’s something that you’ve lost along the way… that you’d like to get back?”
And well, the short answer to that would be my childhood and the relationships I had with my family.
I often dwell in the past and get nostalgic but essentially there used to be easier times. I’m the oldest brother and have three younger siblings. When we were younger we would go for a walk into the mountains nearby and I would make up games and fantasy stories about us hunting monsters or saving the world or other adventures. Even my sister (at the time, more of a tomboy, tbh) would come with me and my brothers to play and have fun and it was a lot simpler at the time.
One time, we met some tourists who got hopelessly lost. We guided them to “the old castle ruin” and I told them a bit about the city’s history since I’m a crack for my hometown’s past… and in the end, they gave us 2€ each, so we got 2 ice cream balls each! – At the time, that was insane for us.
My sister is three years younger than me and my brothers (twins btw) are four years younger than me. As the oldest brother, I was supposed to help them out with school stuff since I at the time knew German better than my parents. They’d let me help them and I was actually helpful to them back then.
It was a simpler time and it all changed when we got our first computer.
Long story short, video games changed my life. While I used it as a much-needed escape, it drove my siblings and me further away from each other. We ended up drifting apart and over time, especially with me moving out two years ago, they don’t really want to talk to me too much and even with me visiting for a week, they don’t really desire to spend too much time with me.
Essentially, I’ve lost the close relationship that I had to my siblings and I’d love to have that again. I’d love to chat with them. I’d love to play with them and hang out and all of that. My girlfriend and her sister are very close, so I somewhat envy her because of that. I really hope that it gets better eventually and I definitely need to work on my relationship to my family members but at the same time, they also have to make some steps to improve it.
As time goes on, they’ll understand how important these things are. They’ll also try their best to get closer to me, hopefully.
I’m here for four days already and it’s making me anxious right now. My father has different appointments to tend to due to his health issues. My mother has to work all the time. My sister is either at her friends’ place or at work. My brothers have school or are spending time with their friends. Hence, I’m left here as if nothing changed. I don’t really get to spend too much time with them and that’s one of the things that are making me anxious right now.
Luckily, I know that everything will turn out for the better eventually. And I also have my blog to turn to and write about things, though I admittedly changed this post now in hindsight, as I don’t think that it’s too fitting to talk about my personal issues too much on a blog like this.
It’s a small relief to be able to write about things. It’s a big relief that I’ll be in my own four walls in just a few more days. It’s an even bigger relief that I’ll be able to talk about all of this when I’ve got my first ever therapy session.
Blaugust is here! But what’s this? This isn’t the usual Blaugust? It’s a special Promptapalooza with a prompt hosted by me! Welcome in! If you have no clue about all of this… then check out the two links in the box below the post… and if you’re here from Beej or other bloggers, welcome in! Nice to meet you! Grab some tea, soda, coffee, or your beverage of choice and let’s have a cosy time today! I hope you’ll enjoy this post of mine. 🙂
So, let’s see… I’m currently at my parents’ and enjoying my time off… and in the evenings before giving in to slumber, I try to read my way through some of these awesome blogs here while thinking about my own prompts… and I still need to catch up to the last ten or so prompts… So those prompts will come out soon and then I’ll change the date in hindsight… but I’ll have to host this one, so this one is coming out before all of the other prompts. I’m sorry for the confusion that that may cause you. I hope it’s somewhat understandable that I may be dead… but I still am human.
Before I explain that last sentence and today’s prompt, I’d like to give a shoutout to Beej from Geek to Geek Media! They hosted a very well-written and amazing post yesterday about their fears and how it affects their content production and consumption. Their very real fears are very similar to some of mine and hence, I can really recommend checking that post out! If you’ve read it already, do it again! Beej also was super adorable at the end with their shoutout to me… really made my day. Thanks a lot for that!
Now… what’s today’s prompt?
“How did you get the name that you regularly go by online, and what if anything does it mean?”
Tadaa! A very cool prompt! Really like this one! Hope you enjoy it!
As far as me goes… it’s somewhat tied to my character over here that I mentioned in my mascot-post! Uh, it’s a bit of a silly story and I think I mentioned it somewhere before in some post… but essentially, I’m from Germany and I love mages and magic and wizards and that kinda stuff in games and movies and other media. The German word for “mage” is “Magier” but when I typed that word into the character-name-box of some game at the age of three or four… only four letters were allowed. Hence, I went with Magi without knowing why exactly it didn’t allow the “-er”. I was young at the time. I knew the word from some show and just remembered what these letters looked like and all of that… and in the end, my name was “Magi” at the time.
Later on, I had these toys from all kinds of sets… there were toy soldiers, different figurines, a barn set and cars and pirates and animals and dinosaurs and whatever… I jumbled up everything much to my siblings’ liking who all would believe the stories I told them about all of the different characters and adventures and stuff… I don’t know… back then, I really enjoyed doing that and my siblings and I were a lot closer. Anyways, there was this black mouse with red eyes that I had there and I essentially claimed that mouse figure as my character “Magimos”. I combined “Magi” with the very “cool”-sounding suffix “-mos” because I liked that name… I imagined it to be some sort of dark undead mage who has been trapped in that body while still being incredibly evil and dangerous.
Eventually, I moved on from toys and – as we had our first ever PC – I started playing online video games… like Dark Orbit and Minecraft. I even played stuff like NeoPets or social games on Facebook… “Magimos” always was my username of choice and for the longest part, it even followed me to Spotify, League of Legends and Twitter, until I eventually started to not feel attached to the name anymore. The “mos”-part really bothered me all the time and most people would call me “Magi” anyway… so, whenever possible, I would end up using Magi… which was essentially never. Magi is quite the popular name, it seems, and hence “Magi” is taken… more often than not. Alas, I used that name on Twitch and Minecraft and League of Legends (after I had enough BE for the name change) and eventually rebranded my whole character to that persona of the lich/necromancer “Magi”.
I always liked the idea of a necromancer or summoner type. Summoning minions to fight by your side in your stead is really cool after all. And as far as the “lich” or “undead” part goes: I quite often enjoy playing the “bad guy” more than the actual heroes in games. Games that leave you the option to wreak havoc and sacrifice humans and stuff are lovely. I really enjoy those.
That mouse character in the past eventually got freed and took the form of a recoloured black mage from FF1 that was supposed to be a necromancer instead. The darkness that is enveloping the face, the pale hands, and the red eyes are something that I use in most of my character-iterations. My character has that as a feature and I really like how it turned out in the end.
Now, while “MagiWasTaken” is quite cool for a name… I also go for some other names every now and then. In some MMOs, the male character model sucks and I create a female one since they’re cuter… “Magimos” never worked for those and “MagiWasTaken” is to username-ish for those… so I ended up using “Lizz Winterfield” in BDO and GW2. It’s another name that I use whenever I see it fitting. It’s my name on Spotify… I have a Facebook account with that name (unless I deactivated it already?)… I use that in Minecraft since I like that one a lot as well. Overall, “MagiWasTaken” and “Lizz_Winterfield” are my go-to-names. “Lizz” is a lovely name after all while “Winterfield” is the most human-sounding name I know.
Where are your usernames from? What did you use in the past? How did your name evolve over time if at all? Why do you stick to it?
I personally feel like I can identify with this mage character quite often in games when I use a name like “MagiWasTaken” or “Magi”. Meanwhile “Lizz Winterfield” really works for me when I play female characters and when I’m trying to roleplay or play a different class instead of my usual stuff.
That was it for today’s post. Hope you enjoyed this one. The next post in line is by Joar from WoW Alt Addiction! Join them and their prompt for more blogging-awesomeness! I can really recommend checking them out and again, check out all the other bloggers who have participated so far and are participating in the next few days. 🙂
This post is part of the Blaugust 2020 event. Wanna know more about it? Then check out my post on it or Bel’s post where he also linked everyone who’s participating! Be sure to check out the others as well!